Start Advice for christians dating non christians

Advice for christians dating non christians

It may make sense to you to do things your way, but that doesn’t mean that God will bless it. I pray you make the right decision —as God would have you: And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ —to the glory and praise of God.

Copyright ©2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Since the beginning of humankind, we have been experiencing the pull towards that, which is “forbidden.” God says, “no” to some things, and just like Eve in the Garden of Eden, we allow ourselves to entertain the question, “Did God actually say…” This is no less true as it pertains to Christians dating non-Christians —the “forbidden fruit.” It can be tempting to go out with someone we are attracted to and think, “this one time won’t hurt.” But then the temptation arises to go out on another occasion, and then another.

Each time there seems to be some good reason why we think it would be okay. God is very serious in what He tells us concerning our “affections.” We are told in 2 Corinthians -18: Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.

For some reason, when it concerns matters of the heart, we can often be swayed to wander further outside of God’s boundaries than we may on other matters. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them,’ says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you, and I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty.’ For those of you who are dating, or are tempted to date a nonbeliever, I’d like to challenge you to reconsider.

It started with a lot of bluster and confidence, mostly on my part. Converting the "lost" was my profession, after all. I also needed to believe this and needed to tell my worried, but open-handed, parents that although I was breaking the one rule they persistently drill into young evangelical girls (aside from no front hugs) — do not date non-Christian men — I was in control and was going to handle the situation. And while we clung tightly to each other and to the notion that love could conquer all, our relationship descended through multiple stages of hell before it finally came to another end.

First, there was the aforementioned "I’m right but you just don’t see it yet" period. Our arguments about how the world worked, whether or not I’d actually witnessed "miracles," and the foundations of morality were emotionally charged.

Dating someone from a different faith can be incredibly rewarding or a disaster of biblical proportions. After dedicating six years to Evangelical Christianity, at 24, I decided to venture into the "real world." I landed on the densely populated isle of O’ahu, Hawaii, where I met a striking doctor-in-training with bone-dry humor, a motorcycle, and a Fu Manchu mustache (it was Movember).

I had recently left the mission field, where my job was to convince people that Jesus loved them.

More than one dinner out ended with me crying at the table in frustration, so we started eating at dimly lit restaurants. It was my family, the only community I had known, my education, and my profession, but it simply wasn’t for the person I loved. Luckily, Adam’s patience was just as strong as his stubbornness, and he put up with Sunday services, my parents prophesying over him, and the celibacy that I had committed to as a 13-year-old (despite the fact that I’d lost my purity ring, oops).

He tried to explain to me that maybe, just maybe, our differences had more to do with rhetoric and semantics than actual value disparities, but I couldn’t accept that. As we passed milestones in our relationship and continued to circle the major issues dividing us, other problems arose — namely, our different cultural expectations.

On our one-year anniversary, my sister called to congratulate us and casually remind us that, on her one-year anniversary, she had gotten engaged.